A time to be quiet. A time to speak.

I strive to do good but end up doing bad. I have two desires that conflict with each other. It is like the demon on one shoulder and angel on the other. Sometimes the demon will be shouting and flooding out the angel that is whispering in my ear. when I am in this point of desolation, I need to stop and think back to when I was in a clear thought. before the temptations of the world was weighing down on me so much. Then I go to a quite place and confess to God what I am dealing with. 

Pray, meditate and focus on what is good. Verbally speak out against it. Don't just ignore it but oppose it. Do the desires of the Spirit when you are tempted with the desires of this world. Confess the freedom you have in Christ Jesus our Savior. Praying in the spirit for The Helper is near and will deliver as promised. 

When you do fall it is so easy to want to keep those failures hidden away. But what you keep in the dark will return and return with more power; so don't keep your sins and failures hidden but confess it to a spiritual leader or friend that understands the struggle, one that will discourage further actions of such and will pray with you. 

When you do good, you want to boast and tell people of the good works you do, but I encourage to keep those in the secret; for when the things that are kept in the secret, they will be the things that really define who you are. Tho it is sometimes good to share when encouraging others and talking about the good God is working in you. But what ever you keep in the secret let it be things of God. When you boast of those things your reward is here on earth but when you keep them in the quiet you will be storing up a much greater reward in heaven.

When you keep good in the secret you will do more good and when you keep bad in the secret you will do more bad, and what you share will fade. 

You tell someone you fed a homeless man, you get a pat on your shoulder and feel good about yourself and enjoy your friend congratulating you for being such a great guy. When you keep it in the secret you have the desire to do it more. You do bad likewise, you tell someone that will keep you accountable and then you feel disappointed and will not do it again or shamefully knowing that you will have to tell them again. But when you keep it secret you might be disappointed in yourself at first, but when the temptation comes again it comes stronger and with vengeance. the more you give into the temptation the more you accept it. It becomes part of you. you stop feeling that shame as you did at first. bring light to that darkness, because wherever light is darkness flees.